Why are you rushing around all the time? What can you do about it? What are you waiting for?

Impatience, irritation and frustration are so common in our society.  We pack our lives with too many things, then rush around from one thing to the next.  We can get frustrated in traffic jams, always trying to get one over on other drivers, overtaking/undertaking, speeding away from the traffic lights.  Do you find yourself sitting at traffic lights frustrated at how long its taking?  Do you find yourself queuing at the supermarket checkout irritated about how slow the person in front  or the cashier are being?  Do you find yourself feeling hurried when getting up and going to work?  Are you stressed in the traffic going to work?

What are you waiting for?  What are your hurrying for?  Whats the rush?
When you get to work, you then spend a lot of the time clock watching for your lunch break, or time to go home. For what?
You're going to get home from the supermarket or from work to go home or somewhere else.  Whats the rush?  
We are always anticipating that the next moment in our lives will be better than the one we are in.  But the next moment is just another moment and our life is made up of these moments.  Our life can be found in all these moments, in the traffic jam, in the queue at the checkout, in the walking to work.
We rush home to what?  To spend time with our family?  To have our dinner?  To relax?  When you're with your family, are you 100% with them or are you thinking about what job you need to do next, cook dinner, sort out the washing.  
Or are you carrying stress or overthinking from the day you've had at work, or a difficult conversation you had with a friend?  do you really relax?  When you're cooking dinner are you rushing to cook dinner because theres something on tv?  Or you're going out with friends?  When you're out with friends are you 100% present?  Or are you thinking that you need to keep an eye on the time because you don't want to have a late night because you have to get up for work.
So many of us work to live and live to work.  What for?  We then look forward to our 2 week holiday, where we can relax and spend time with our family or friends.  Do we relax, are we present on our holiday?  Do we know how to be present?  Maybe we unwind for the first week, but then the 2nd week is often spent, wistfully counting down the days until the holiday ends and we're back to work.
Some of us love our work, but are still spending a lot of time clock-watching, hurrying to the next task.  
Not meaning to be depressing but this is how a lot of us spend a lot of our time: clock-watching, waiting for the next thing to happen, hurrying from one task to another, wishing away the time we spend queuing, commuting, travelling, wishing our lives away, looking forward to our next holiday.  Then when we have an activity we really want to be in, we are untrained in knowing how to enjoy the moment, so that moment passes all too soon, and we didn't even relish it and enjoy it to the full.

Observe the sitting in the traffic.  Let the car in the side road come in front of you.  Notice your frustration.  Drive at the speed limit.  How does that feel?  Frustrating?

Our life is happening in the moment.  Right now.  How do we become in the moment, the present moment, the here and now?  We stop.  Right now.  Breathe.  Notice our breath.  Notice the rise and fall of our chest.  Notice the sounds around you.  Notice the colours around you.  Notice your physical body.  Are you aware of your hands, your back, your feet, the muscles of your face.

I think most of us would agree, ultimately, we want to feel peace of mind, contentment, happiness.

The more we practise being in the present moment, the more peace we invite into our lives.  Our creative power is in the here and now.

Courses, workshops and meditation groups in Brighton with Elaine Gibbons.

www.elainegibbons.co.uk

Do you want to create change in your life - a How to guide.....

Change is all that is happening, every moment of every day.
I love this ancient chinese proverb "The only certain thing in life is change"
According to quantum physics, matter (human beings, computers, rocks, trees, water) is formed of atoms, which consists of subatomic particles constantly moving.  It has been recognised that we affect these particles with our attention and our intention.  We are surrounded by an energy field that responds to our thoughts/intention/attention/beliefs/  So we are literally creating our lives with our thoughts.  Atoms that are resonating at the same frequency attract each other.  Our thoughts have a magnetic field effect.
To start the process of creating change, you need to initially get really clear about what you want, where you want to be heading, what your vision is.  If you don't give the universal energy field a clear picture about what you wish to draw into your life, it will respond to your most dominant thoughts.
Thoughts are creative.  Every item or object was once just a thought or idea in someone's mind.
I personally have moments where I am completely going with the flow of what is happening in my life and other times where I have huge amounts of resistance and frustration.  
Then there is the issue with belief!  Surely I can't ask for something that seems so far from where I am right now?
When you are asking for something you want to create in your life, your negative beliefs about not receiving can be so strong )for whatever reason) that a huge amount of negativity can come up, which needs to be processed/released to effect change and movement in thoughts.
Eckhart Tolle (The Power of Now) talks about how the ego doesn't want change and we create resistance.  He says, when faced with a situation you don't want, you either take steps to change it, or you accept it, everything else is futile, a waste of energy and taking away your power from the present moment; the power that comes with knowing that thoughts are creative.
Your thoughts of today are creating your tomorrows.

Do you work with affirmations? A "How To" guide:

Working with affirmations:
Affirmations can be a really powerful tool to work with when you're looking to invite changes into your life.  

When you are sitting with your vision board/visualisation (that we have discussed in previous blogs) or you have written your dream down in a beautiful journal; or you have created a beautiful collage with magazine cuttings/pictures and you are starting to work with this visualisation a few minutes each day; maybe you have started sharing this vision with a friend or others and you are getting yourself some support with your dream manifestation.  
Working with affirmations can then really help support this work and move it on.

So, take yourself to this dream scenario/vision, and imagine that you are already living this life, what would you beliefs have to be if you were already living this dream life?  Sit with this for a few moments.  Start writing down these beliefs, in the present tense. 

For example:
I am loved
I am supported
I am wealthy
I am abundant
I am living in my dream house
I am living with my ideal partner,
I am surrounded with love and support
I am vibrating with perfect health
I am happy
I am vibrant
I am alive and enjoying life
I am in my dream job.  I am supported and acknowledged at work.

Start writing all these beliefs down.  Ideally start the affirmation with I am.  Use the present tense.  Maybe start putting them around your house.  

One of the ways of working with affirmations is when you say "I am wealthy" for example, then notice your negative thoughts and feelings that come up when you say it.  So if you say "I am vibrating with perfect health" - what thoughts then follow that - it might be
"oh but I'm not really"  "My back hurts"  " I have got arthritis" "I am in pain." 
Write these negative thoughts down, write them down and release them.  Ask your higher self to transmute this negativity, to help you release these beliefs that are no longer serving us.  Let go of these negative thoughts.  Because if you want to create this vibrant health, or these perfect finances, or this ideal job, we need to let go of our negative thought patterns and beliefs around it, because the universe doesn't give back to us what we think, it gives back to us what we believe.

So we can be saying/repeating "I am a wealthy person" but in our heads believing that we are not, that we are in fact poor.  

You could start by saying "I am choosing to allow wealth into my life"  This might feel more believable.  Go back to an affirmation that you can believe and that you can start to work with.  "I am intending to attract more money into my life."  "I am starting to believe that I can become more wealthy."
I am intending to be vibrantly healthy.  I am asking for guidance and diving inspiration for  ideas that help me in achieving perfect health.

Its really important to release the negative, don't ignore it, if it's there, we need to bring it to our awareness to be able to observe it and release it and to start choosing to believing more supportive thoughts.

I am choosing to believe that anything is possible.
I am intending to start to believe that there are other ways of attracting what I want into my life.

Buddha  " We are a result of all we have thought"

When you are working with these affirmations and your visualisation of your dream, don't sit around wondering how you are going to create this new life.  Don't get into your intellectual rational logical brain about how things are going to change.  
Just give this information about your new thoughts and beliefs to the universe and watch it return and reflect back to you, what you are thinking about and creating.  Hand it over.  This is what I want, I am changing my thought pattern, I am raising my energetic field to receive more of what I want into my life and then wait to see what the universe gives back to you. 

See what new people and situations come into your life.  The conversations you overhear or have with others.  The books you happen to start reading.  The tv programs you are drawn to watch.  Notice the divine symbols and inspired guidance that is coming your way.  Listen to your inner voice.  Act on any intuitive thoughts and feelings you have.  Follow any divinely inspired ideas that come to you.
Start looking out for divine signs and inspiration!  Enjoy the journey!

Transform your Life: Follow your Dreams

Courses, groups, workshops from September 2015

www.elainegibbons.co.uk

Working with Divine Inspiration. Dare to be different.

Look out for divine signs, inspired ideas and synchronicities - follow these to your dream life!

Following on from previous blogs, you've worked through the previous suggestions, you have got your vision board, you have done some visualisation of your dreams, maybe started working with a friend/support group.  You've got some clarity, handed it over to the universe, working with some affirmations.  The more you do this work, the more energy you give to this, the closer your dream becomes.

But your dream life is going to come to you through certain channels.  For example, it might be that if you are looking for a dream house, you can't just sit and visualise, you still need to act.  You need to contact the agents and tell them what you want.  Go and visit some places.  If you want a new amazing job, get as clear as you can about all the qualities and then start asking around, looking in the job adverts, applying, going for interviews etc

So when you are handing your vision over to the universe, and you're working with your affirmations, and your 30 day diet of breaking the habit of negative thinking, you're really starting to introduce positive thoughts into your life that will take you in the direction of your dreams; you do then need to start looking out for Divine Signs/Symbols.  

It might be conversations you overhear, books that are recommended, a conversation you have with a friend, something you read on a billboard, or the side of a lorry.  A lorry drove past me yesterday with the only words along the side "Follow your Dreams"!!!  What are the chance of that!

How are you feeling, what's your intuition, what are your hunches?  Follow your heart.  What is your heart saying to you, follow your feelings, follow your passion.  This is how we "hear" our inner voice, through our feelings.

Through meditation, we can quieten our mind, or through gentle and/or repetitive exercise - yoga/walking/swimming/running.  Sometimes a flash of inspiration can come to you.  Don't sit and try and think out how or what to do with your logical brain.  You need to sit quietly, quieten the mind and feel.

Sometimes you get a sudden bolt of an idea.  But more often, it's a quiet whisper.  Call a friend, or watch this program, or read this article, or go to this place.  Follow these whisperings.  The more you listen to and follow your intuition, the louder it becomes.  It is a practice and all new practices need discplined practise.  Dare to be different.  Follow your dreams.  Be brave.  Where is your passion.  Follow your heart.  What motivates you.  Don't follow the crowd.  Have confidence in your intuition.  Your soul calls to you through your dreams/your passions.  

Notice the signs and the symbols that are coming from the universe.

Expect change in your life.  If you are asking for change, expect things to start changing.  Change can feel really scary.  There's a leap into the unknown.  Have faith.  Sometimes things seem to be dropping away from you and you didn't expect that to happen.  Expect the unexpected.  Be courageous.  Some people leave your life, some people start to come into your life.  You might not be getting on well with people that you have known for years.  Maybe their energy no longer resonates with yours.  But you will also be attracting new people into your life, that resonate more closely to where you are now at.
Maybe you want a new job. Maybe you lose your job - which can feel very traumatic and worrying.  Trust the process.  You have to let go of certain things to create space for new things to come to you.
Ask the universe for what you want, then start to believe that you can have this, then you have to receive it.  ASK BELIEVE RECEIVE.  This means that you need to change and to expect changes.

Question yourself.  Challenge your current beliefs.  Is this particular belief still working for you?  Does it make sense that you are still clinging on to a particular belief?  Do you need to start choosing to believe different things, that life can be different?

Work with meditation and mindfulness.  Do you want to carry on choosing to believe the range of thoughts that travel across your mind?  Or can you observe and detach.  Then choose to believe more life-enhancing thoughts.

Transform your Life : Follow your Dreams

Courses, groups, meditations in Brighton from November 6th.

www.elainegibbons.co.uk

What makes you feel good? Do it - and change the world at the same time!

Oh its so easy to complain and moan about life - the weather, how expensive everything is, how unwell we feel, how cold/hot we are, how old/wrinkled/fat/thin/unfit we are.  How many tragedies there are in the world and how we cant do anything about it, how corrupt our politicians are.    Some of us just seem to be innately pessimistic and negative.

It is great to know that we can change.  We can start changing today, right now.  We can look around us and notice something we are grateful for.  We can observe something good in our lives, in the world around us, in our partner, our boss, our challenging child, our bodies.  The minute we start shifting our focus, our energy starts shifting.  This then has a knock on effect on everyone we come into contact with.  If we all did this, every day, within such a short time, the world would be a much easier place to live in.

We need to focus using our energy on feeling good.  I have already discussed the major benefits of gratitude.  But this blog is discussing what we can do if we are stuck in a negative mindset.  How do we shift our energy focus right now, today.  What makes you feel good?  What thing/person/statement/object could make you feel better right now today?  I highly recommend making a list of things that you know make you feel better.  I call these "mood shifters"

Mood shifters.  As we are starting to work with more positive thoughts that are taking us in the direction of our dreams, maybe using some affirmations, we want to be feeling good.  Normally the reason why most people want change in their life , is they want to feel good.  You want to enjoy your life.  Enjoy what you're doing all day.
You cant be feeling good and thinking negative thoughts and you cant be feeling bad and thinking positive thoughts.
Your feelings are a good indicator, a good feedback system for where your mental activity is focussed right now.  If you aren't feeling good, you are thinking negatively.  Stop.  Observe what you are thinking.  Try and detach.   If this isn't possible then you need to start working with some "mood shifters".
Write down a list of things that you know that make you feel better (as long as nothing is done at the expense of others or might cause others suffering).  It might be music - uplifting or motivational music (RESPECT by Aretha Franklin is currently going around in my head!!); it might be having a hot bath; it might be walking in nature; it might be talking to a friend/family member;
If you aren't feeling good, then do something from your mood shifters list.
If you then notice that you don't want to do one of these things that you know will make you feel better - notice that!  Observe.  That's very interesting.  Why wouldn't we want to do something that you know will make you feel better.  Why are you self-sabotaging?  It is normally because the ego is resistant to change and wants us to stay as we are.  Stay with our old habits of negative thinking.  Even though its not great for us, its familiar and the ego likes familiarity.
Dont allow your ego to sabotage the new you.  If you want to see change in your life, start doing things differently, start attending to your needs, start honouring your desire to feel good.
Eat well, exercise your body.  These things make you feel good.
Write your mood shifters list now.

Some suggestions:
Hot bath
Walk in nature - woodland/beach
Massage
Music - uplifting anthems
Make a photo album that reminds you of happy memories
Going out with a friend
Having a good meal with a friend
Going to a comedy night
Watching a comedy film
Chatting with a friend
Walking barefoot on the grass
Reading uplifting books
Sunshine
Going on holiday somewhere hot
Swimming
Yoga
Walking the dog
Burning candles/sage/incense
Dancing
Having a log fire
Meditation

Remember, its not indulgent to change something/to shift your mood/to want to feel good.  Its vitally important.   The more people that start doing this today, the ripple effect goes out far and wide.  As individuals we can make a difference.  Do something different today - feel good!

Follow your Dreams and transform your life - course, groups and meditations from September 2015 in Brighton.

www.elainegibbons.co.uk

Follow your Dreams - daily techniques to enable this!

There are techniques you can use on a daily basis to support you creating your dream life.  If, for example, you are doing the 30 day "break the habit of negative thinking" diet (see previous blog); there are lots of different things you can do daily.
I really recommend daily work as it is habit forming.  We are creatures of habit.  If you want to create change, you have to start changing things in your life.  Its no good just changing it for a couple of days, or a couple of hours, you need to set up a new habit that helps you to create what you want in your life.

• Gratitude - is a very useful technique to start working with.  Do not underestimate the benefits of working with gratitude.  So if you are thinking "what do I have to be grateful for?" then look around you.  There will always be something.  Maybe it's your health.  Maybe it's that you have enough food to eat.    What about a house?  Do you have a house to live in - that is warm and comfortable enough?  Then you have that to be grateful for.  Think of how many people there are on this planet that don't have their basic human needs being met.  Even if you don't own your house and you are renting; even if you are having to claim benefits to be able to afford your house, you can be grateful that you live in a society that supports you.  What about clothes, do you have enough clothes?  Dont ever think that you dont have anything to be grateful for.  There might be a lot of things you want to change in your life.  You might dislike your job, and you might be thinking how can I be happy and grateful when I have this job and just look forward to the weekend.  Do you have a partner - that you love and that loves you?  Do you have children?  Parents?  Do you have your health? All of these things can add to a long list of things in our life that we can feel grateful for.  The more energy you give to all these things in your life that you can be grateful and thankful for; the more you give thanks and gratitude to the universe on a daily basis - the more the universe will respond to you by giving back more and more things for you to be grateful for.  What you focus on expands.  If you spend your time complaining, then you will attract more things into your life for you to complain about.  So gratitude is a very useful, possibly the number 1 daily technique that I would recommend.  I would recommend setting a reminder on your phone/computer to pop up three times a day to ask you to think of up to 10 things that you feel grateful for right at that moment.
• Journal writing.  This is another tool that you can use on a daily basis that can help you create new habits of more useful ways of thinking;  ways that are drawing more good things to you, more of the things you want in your life.  Maybe you would use your journal to debrief at the end of the day.  Look over the day, dont berate yourself, dont ever use it as a tool to punish yourself "what have I done wrong?"  Debrief from your day.  Did I spend all morning complaining about something?  What can I do differently tomorrow?  
• Look at your vision board.  Give it energy.  Look at it for 5 minutes a day, focus on your vision.  Maybe add something to it.  Refine/clarify.  Trust that you will receive this or more for your highest good.  Use your imagination, and imagine yourself in that dream life for 5 minutes a day.  Feel how good that feels.
• Meditation/mindfulness.  Both of these are very helpful if not essential!  They help us to draw quiet times into our lives.  They give us time out.  Time to observe our breathing.  Time to observe our thoughts at that time.  Turn inwards.  Become less attached to all the drama going on around us.  There are meditation apps, mediation/mindfulness groups in every town, meditations on youtube.  Try it out.  I would really recommend a minimum of 10 minutes per day, ideally half an hour, twice daily.  Or you might want to try a weekend mediation retreat - there are plenty around the country.  This longer meditation space enables your chattering mind to really quieten down, which enables you to hear your inner self.
• Reading inspiring/uplifting books.  Spiritual books, law of attraction books, mindfulness books.  Please see previous blog for recommend authors.  Or quotes on facebook/twitter.  Seeing these on our newsfeed can be really helpful/useful messages at particular times.
• Start the day with "Thank you".  The first two words that come out of your mouth as you awake could be thank you.  Thank you that I have woken up to this new day of infinite possibilities.  Thank you with each footstep as you walk to the bathroom, thank you for your hot shower, for you flushing toilet, for your tap water, for your soft towel, for your warming clothes etc  How lucky and blessed we are.

Transform your Life: Follow your Dreams!

Workshops, courses, groups from September 2015.

www.elainegibbons.co.uk

What is success? Are you successful? Do you want to be successful?

I recently read a magazine interview with Natalie Imbruglia talking about how when she rose to fame she was "highly successful and famous but desperately unhappy".  This got me thinking - what is our definition of success?  The implication in the interview was that money and fame is success - but if she was "desperately unhappy" how could you call yourself successful?  

One of my passions in life is to help people to have successful lives.  But what does that mean?  How do we evaluate success?  It depends on so many factors.  We all come from different starting points and all have a different path to lead in life.  I think a lot of people in the western nations would call themselves successful if they have plenty of money,  a "good" job, a good house and a loving family.  But what is a good job?  One that pays well?  One that is reliable/secure?  How much money do you personally need to feel successful?  Is success a state of mind?  One persons success ie a "good" job could feel like another's prison.

In western nations, you are considered successful if you are a high academic achiever.  Does that ultimately make you happy though?  And if you are wealthy.  Does money make you happy/successful?

What about if your strength isn't academically?  How can you then achieve success in the eyes of society?  Do you need to be successful in the eyes of the society you live in?

It concerns me that our individual expression is being discouraged.  Our education systems seem to encourage lack of individual thinking.  Some secondary schools are phasing out the Arts as they aren't deemed to be decent subjects - in the eyes of whom?  The universities looking to get the bright children on their courses so they can then work in pressured stressful office jobs for years, hooked by the golden handcuff promise of a good pension and private health care.

We seem to have become a society that expects to feel stressed and busy most of the time.  I'm shocked by how many of my clients seem to be resigned to stress being a "normal" part of their daily lives for many years.  How can living from an adrenalised place be natural/normal or something we want to promote?

If you want to achieve success in your life, maybe you need to start by defining what success looks like for you.  Just you.  Not for your parents, your friends, your religious upbringing, your society.  But just for you.  It is easier to get to where you want to go, if you know where you are heading.

Maybe success is having a goal/dream and working towards that, embracing the lessons you learn along the way.  Maybe success for you is finding an inner contentment.  Knowing that even though some days you may be observing your predominant emotion is sadness or anger, that deep within you have a level of contentment and confidence that you are ok.  At a soul level, all is well.

My passion is encouraging people to live their lives fully, feeling confident and brave enough to follow their divinely inspired dreams and visions.  Sometimes we may need to take risks.  But do we want to look back and have regrets, or feel like we have wasted our life? or played it too safely?  Following our passions and dreams makes us feel alive.

I am running mini life-coaching courses from 25th September in Brighton on Friday mornings and Monday evenings, supporting and encouraging people to follow their dreams and living a full and passionate life.  I also offer one-to-one life coaching in person, via telephone or skype. 

Please go to my website www.elainegibbons.co.uk for more information and to book.